A few things to mention before getting into the latest installment.
1- These stories are real but of course I've renamed the toads, the locations, etc.
2- I am recounting stories that began back in January - and its possible I add a lil color to them and maybe not list each word in order, cause lets be honest -- I'm not trying to tell my grandmother these stories -- I want to make it fun!
3- I recognize I may get some reactions like "well of course this chick is single, look at how critical or picky she is!" Fair. But those that know me, know that there is a tall order to be filled out there -- and I'm ok with taking the time to find the right person. I'm ok with saying I'm 28 and didn't settle with the wrong person yet! So in the meantime, I am certainly going to find the humor in it -- How else can I stay open and trust the process?!
Back to regularly scheduled programming...
Toad #2 - second week in on toadorprince.com. Nickname: "Messenger Bag". Lesson Learned: if his bag is bigger than mine, we just might have a problem!
During my second week on toadorprince.com, I was gifted with many "matches". Messenger Bag earned a meet 'n greet with his seemingly creative sense of humor. We met for beers at a popular beer/burger spot - of course only agreeing to beers until I was comfortable enough with his height to consume some food. He said he was 6'3" -- but heck, I needed to confirm first.
Sure enough, he was! Phew. But it seemed he was also packing a lot of carry-on for this adventure. A messenger bag on a date? Ok he was a super-smart-PhD - micro, something or other... so maybe those science types need the extra luggage? But was he prepared to camp out in case I didn't show up? Was this his portable earthquake survival skit? I decided to hold my questions til later.
He seemed somewhat normal and he offered to go order us some beers -- and because he was tall enough -- I agreed to the burger too. When we came to the crossroad of order another beer or call it a night -- I decided to stay. I was genuinely enjoying myself. But he squirmed and hesitated too long when one would expect he'd get up to order the next round. Sorta like expecting me to offer to pay and go order. Well I don't like awkward moments - so I did. And I'm not dating just to supplement the budget... it just was like, come on - its the first date, man up!
Long story short, our first date miraculously led to a second date the next week. Sure enough - the messenger bag made another appearance and so did the theme of picking restaurants where you had to order at the bar. This time he squirmed right from the get go about who should go order our food and drinks at the bar. The squirm lasted too long for my liking so again I jumped up and he seemed more than amenable to that. Figures. Don't super smart PhD guys make any money?!
Somehow I was talked into date #3 - why? Well he was "nice" and "tall" and "cute". Ya, that seemed like enough...but I knew, if no chemistry was building or his man-up-and-take-action skills didn't improve, the third was going to be the last.
And not to worry - the messenger bag seemed to love the chance to get all dressed up and join us on our date again! Yay - Ugh.
And finally, we ate at a restaurant where we got served at the table. I decided I had finally earned the right to ask - just what is in that bag of yours?! Its bigger than my purse!
He was so excited to show it off -- uh oh here it comes -- there is my epi-pen (isn't that a small item?!), my work phone, my personal phone, my business cards, some tissues (is he an obsessive hand washer too?!), a book, some work reading, my wallet, my checkbook, some.... ok my mind was drifting off at this point, we had certainly reached a crossroad where this was clearly always going to bother me. Did he also carry a flotation device in case the date got awkward and he actually had to pay for the entire meal and drinks? If he sold this bag of his and all of his contents, would he then have enough money to pay?! He was clearly the eternal student at heart and it was not going to match my more professional and sophisticated self. When the check came and he stared at it and paused, I jumped in with "how should we take care of this?! We all know this is a kind female's attempt to be polite but any guy will say in the first few dates --he should be paying. Its just how it is. We're not in college anymore, get it together! This was his last chance. His response - "well um we could split it?!"... ok homey - I think we're done here. I hope you and your bag have a nice life together.
Next!
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